When I started homeschooling I had this Idea in my head that I would have all the time in the world. My house would be super duper organised, my children would have all the life skills they need to do the chores, cook and study. That they would always be smiling and with eager attitude follow all instructions.
My son would graduate college by the time he is 12 and that we would be super rich living f the amazing inventions he came up as a homeschooling genius child. We would live a proventional life , free from screen time and our children would produce hand calligrapher xmas cards for the entire 234 people in our extended family.
Everyone would love to be around our kids who would have amazing manners, answers to all existential question and would calculate complicated algebra in their heads.
I would get 8 h sleep every night, with our homemade high end designed curriculum being independent carried on by my children. No guaidance needed. I would sing and bake and wear a Cath Kidston apron. My blog would attract people from all over the world, and everyone would congratulate me on my successful book which I would write and publish and make millions.
Then the reality happened.
The slap from the universe.
The kids were up super early, they would refuse to complete various tasks. The house looked like a scene from a horror movie. Books everywhere, pencils, crayons, the sciccors went AWOL.
Day after day, there is no dinner, there is no organic chutneys being produced.
My nights were spend researching the internet for free ready made printables.
First week passes. I’m researching boarding schools, far away from home.
The kids would fuss and whine and forget to say please and thank you.
My university degree seemed now like a waste of time, money and effort.
I was being defeated by my own children.
Then I overheard my kids talking. “We may as well be at school..mum is so boring”
Proper punch from the universe this time.
My idealistic homeschooling dream has been ripped into pieces and burnt to ashes.
At this point I was ready to announce my own defeat. The realisation that I failed them was the worst. I wanted to give them the best start in life but instead I messed them up even more.
Husband who normally doesn’t get involved in my motherly existence decided to tell me his point of view. “Why are you being so hard on yourself and them?”
And that was it. That was all I needed.
My vision needed to be altered. My dreams needed to be made more achievable and realistic. There is nothing wrong with having high ambitions and aspirations, but to achieve them we need achievable and realistic goals.
I realised I needed to make this to work. To simplyfi, to make it interesting. It’s them who are being the centre of attention , it’s their homeschooling journey as much as it was mine. The realisation came quickly with a lot of solutions. I didn’t need to spend my nights learning how to play a guitar, all I needed to do is to hire a tutor, online programmes and app were a big no no, but with the technology being the centre of attention and main income in modern society I realised I couldn’t stop my kids from using it.
We needed to find a balance, our main focus is still hands on learning, but now we use technology and we are not scared of implementing it.
Both kids do coding classes online and they both thrive in them. We concentrate on things that we know they kids are good at and that they enjoy. If there are subjects we struggle with we look for different solutions and approaches.
I’m not defeated, my dream is not over or never to be achieved, we get better and better everyday at realising the harmony of our idealistic homeschooling life.
So remember. Don’t be so hard on yourself, or them. You are doing great, you are doing what’s the best for your Family!
Light and love xxxx